For months I have been trying to formulate my personal statement for graduate school. Finally the other day I considered story-boarding it. I have never been too keen on the notion; however I have had many paths and directions to follow. It's tough to decide. How do I sum myself up convincingly enough to get into the school I desire? I must make myself worthy of the future I want. And that alone is a daunting task.
I feel distracted now to trace the ideas of self-worth down this fated path; however, for now, I will choose to follow the intent of these prose (as I wonder if the power of direction in this essay is in the prose or in me to type…?) Oh the bewildering!
And thus my story goes….I came home from work and put my things away. The brink came to decide what to do to start my night. How do I make the most of my evening? My free time that I have so little of? I put the restraints on my mind and focused on the task, the dream at hand. Sticky notepads and markers appeared on my couch. I found myself piecing together words, phrases that I want to include in my essay. The stickiness wasn't taking to my walls so I found the masking tape and posted them in a blob. All over the wall in my bedroom the phrases formed a sort of circle. Oval maybe.
The masking tape helped them stick. Stick they stuck.
Yesterday in the exempt staff meeting we were vaguely, very vaguely, talking about timelines and the future. All I could consider was where I want to be six months in the future. A year? The answer wasn't where I was.
The answer was on my wall, in a blob. A mess, but an answer. I knew I had to come home and reorganize. That is just what I did. It was as though my blob was smothered but not completely. Smooshed. I made my blob turn linear. I rearranged my notes starting with my past to present to future wants. Looking back on it the next night, it made most sense. I could formulate my essay from this.
The trouble comes tonight. I lay in bed ready to relax and fall asleep. Looking at the notes I want to arrange them now by color. I used various marker colors (11 to be exact). I feel the need/desire to trace them by color to determine another view of combining my thoughts by other than time.
If I do that, here is what would match:
Germany & Italy, interaction real culture
Cultural impact, human rights
Passion, multi-cultural, intellectual challenge
Diversity, International Club, American freedoms
Ms. Gagnon, explore
APG BA, connect communities
Study abroad, knowledge
UN / NYC trip, worldly
Change agent
Burned Alive
Very interesting the matches I find, especially the passion train.
Lascivious
